Mar 4, 2008

Gaseous Gadfly Gagged

Acknowledged misanthrope and notorious nut job, Ming T. Merciless was escorted from Dendreon Headquarters this morning under tight restraint. Mr. Merciless was alleged to be found hanging toilet paper streamers in the area of the quarterly presentation to be made later this month. Bunting he appended to the podium read, "To Get Rich, Ditch Mitch" and "The Board Is Broken, Its Just A Token". After a violent struggle, requiring several officers to now undergo a painful series of rabies shots, a list of questions, presumably for that meeting was confiscated. Included were the following queries; 1) What was Big Pharma's best offer that you rejected? 2) Is the kissing booth limited to shareholders of record or can all shareholders getting screwed also at least get kissed? 3) Can Ming open a fan-tan parlor on the premises to help idle employees fill those long lonely hours? 4) How many charges does management incur daily dialing Miss Cleo's Psychic Hotline asking about Provenge approval? 5) Dr. Gold, as an urologist, whats your professional opinion of Pazdur becoming less pissy if catherized and can shareholders watch? The NYPD refuses to forward a complete list of Ming's priors citing inability to dedicate sufficient manpower due to budgetary constraints.

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