Compensation Cornucopia Causes Cash Crunch

Notorious cheapskate and disgruntled stockholder Ming was agog to see the lush compensation package afforded employees as follows from Dendreon website;, "We offer a comprehensive benefits package for our full-time employees that reflects our commitment to the health and well-being of our employees and their families. For eligible employees and their dependents, Dendreon will pay 100% for employee and 75% for dependent premiums for:

* Medical

* Dental

* Vision

Dendreon will pay the premium for:

* Life Insurance
* Accidental Death & Dismemberment
* Disability

Other benefits include:

* Three weeks paid vacation per year
* Ten paid holidays
* 40 hours of sick leave per year
* Employee Assistance Program
* Matching 401(k) plan
* Public transportation subsidy
* Tuition subsidy program " .Shareholder Ming is stunned by largess of revenue deficient Dendreon and has many questions. How do these idle employees know when they are actually on their three week vacations? Do any of the paid holidays fall on Mitch's birthday? Why not rent them out for experiments on sick days since they're sick anyway? Is there also an assistance program when Ming gets a margin call? Who matches Ming's losses which are very many K? Are they so improvident that they don't even have bus fare on Monday mornings? Why subsidize training so they can get better job elsewhere? As for insurance,it looks like an employee gets a paper cut and is set for life. All this costs about $20.8 million per year not to mention stock dilution caused by various stock awards and options. Not a bad deal for hanging around waiting to see if the FDA likes interim results. Make Ming Compensation Manager. One small bowl of rice per day based on exemplary performance with free protein in every maggot, gratis. No need for transportation. Sleep in office on straw mats in shifts. Plenty of ticks in ticking to keep employees sharp. Also plenty apples in Washington State. Farm out lazy employee's idle time picking bushels on day labor, piecework basis. Plenty bad apples in Washington D.C. too. Use savings to make their lives miserable. Stockholder Ming is tired of being anemic from everyone sucking his blood. Or maybe Ming just needs more roughage in his diet.