Ming Solves Oil Spill Fiasco

Once again, it seems that only Ming has the answer to yet another world problem. Plugging the gushing oil leak is child's play if you have the mind of Ming.

All one need do is find a few thousand Americans on a high fiber diet. Position their posteriors over the hole and arm them with two ply toilet tissue. The stray paper towel would also be in order. This always works at Ming's house and should thoroughly plug the well in a trice.

All solid citizen Ming asks in recognition is a statue of himself striking a heroic pose to be situated on the North Lawn of the White House. Perhaps in honor of his achievement, said statue could more appropriately depict a grinning Ming crouched over while artfully wiping his derriere with some recent piece of legislation. You can bet that's what the stalwarts at British Petroleum are doing right about now.