New Hope For The Dead

Don't give up those luscious Dendreon shares just because you lack a pulse. The future capital gains flowing from those shares could prove useful in the afterlife which may not have rent control. What if you can't otherwise afford a harp and have to spend eternity blowing on some cheap kazoo? Send for our free booklet, "Thumbing your Nose at Those Left Behind". Learn how putting your Dendreon shares in the Church of Ming's name enables Minister Ming, who has been conferred with a special communication of power, or angkur(dbang skur), from his Masters in Tibet, to waft capital gains to your heavenly abode. If, as is more likely, you find yourself going elsewhere, use those gains to finance some asbestos undies to alleviate your discomfiture. Our booklet comes to you in a plain brown wrapper appropriately marked, Final Notice, which also serves to foil spoilsport postal inspectors and suspicious relatives.