An Insult to Blattella Asahinai, the Asian Cockroach

How better to learn about hedge fund managers than from Foul Foo who lives in the Alley of Ten Thousand Cockroaches. After losing a battle for what was once a tuna fish sandwich to the roaches, Foo is in a foul mood and eager to disparage them by a comparison to hedge fund managers. Both avoid the light of day. Each make group decisions by following a chemical trail of feces to their source of sustenance. Both always take up residence in a the same location. They are difficult to kill off since a mere human can only withstand 800 rems of radiation while the roach and apparently the hedgie can withstand 67,500 rems. Most importantly, both can live up to a month without a head. Thus, should Stevie depart, the rest of the body could even live on for a time. The pedantic Foo goes on to note that the best way to dispose of them is to place between two hard surfaces and apply pressure. Unfortunately, the SEC and the Justice Department are not those hard surfaces.