Uplifting Attempt At Culture Backfires

Culture loving Ming suffers third degree burns and its all Tchaikovsky's fault. Ming was innocently entertaining friends with a bravura rendition of The 1812 Overture emanating from his burito and flan fueled flatulations when a careless smoker attempted to light a cigarette. The ensuing explosion set off car alarms six blocks away. From now on, poor Ming will confine his recitals to low volume renditions of Elvira by the Oak Ridge Boys and to hell with culture. Until then, Ming remains on a low fiber, very bland diet until the source of his musical inspiration heals.