Nov 26, 2008

Ming Makes Lemonade From Lemons

Gracious host Ming brings out a nice glass jar filled with poisonous snakes fermenting in baijiu. The Chinese consider snake alcohol to be medicinal and comrade Wei Pork Yu, author of the latest five year plan is honored.

After much lubrication, Wei's tongue is loosened and begins to brag that his five year plan calling for stimulus in the form of new infrastructure will provide the basis for Chinese expansion. He sneers that the U.S. attempts to arouse banks to keep lending to consumers will be a boon only to the Chinese finger puzzle industry as they fritter away their money on tchotskes. He says that then the U.S. will be forced to sell it's assets to the cash rich and more productive Chinese.

The major source of it's foreign exchange will then be Chinese tourist dollars as they arrive to tour their new colony. America will become a nation of waiters and prostitutes(think France). They will be reduced to producing rickshaws for internal consumption since no one will be able to afford an auto. Only PhDs will be allowed to apply for the relatively lucrative position of rickshaw puller and will be the envy of the less well educated masses.

Ming will grow rich selling plastic sandals and straw coolie hats for Brooks Brothers new line of executive wear.

1 comment:

Unknown said...

Seeing your comments on France, I think you have not visited my country of birth in decades.
Since the Marthe Richard law that closed the brothels after the second world war and outlawing this useful profession, it has been slowly outsourced. Mainly to citizens of other countries I will not mention.
As for the other profession too, but I suppose for different reasons.
A generally articulate Ming using such clichés disapoints me, tsss...