Ming Watches Super Bowl

Entire problem revolves around there only being one football. Opposing team becomes enraged that they can't fondle football and biggest members assault opposing team. Seeing what's in store for him, football fondler cleverly throws ball to team member furthest behind. That worthy, fearing for his life, prudently throws ball to team member already so frightened that he's running toward locker room. Idea is to catch ball and keep running away. This seldom works as planned.

Whole point of game is to create excuse for doing grievous bodily harm to other team members without getting caught by guys dressed in underwear. Knocking them down and stepping on them seems acceptable but player only allowed rabbit punches and choke holds when guys in underwear not looking.

It seems to sports fan Ming that greater efficiency could be achieved by arming teams with brass knuckles and saps. But then again all the saps are already in the stands.